This is my personal journey and sounds ominous right? Let's travel!
I wanted to write and share this blog with the very moment that started all this.
All this movement forward.
The moment that told me for sure there was something, bigger, something greater and something real.
My Mom had been brought to ER after having a relapse from being sent home from the hospital. I was waiting for her in the ER ward. The nurses told me she was gone for tests when the doors flew open and my Mom was wheeled in on a gurney.
She was stone white.
Mom had flatlined!!
The immediate response was echoing over the intercom. "Code Blue". "Code Blue".
The ward filled with nurses, nurse assistants, lab techs, doctors and the scary AED(Automated External Defibrillator). The nurse was readying the pads to be pressed down on my Moms chest.
The doctor grabs the pads and pressed on Mom's chest. "Clear"!!
Mom's body jumps up and back down. No response!
The doctor gets the pads again and pressed the pads again on Mom. "Clear"! And again No response.
The entire room turned to me. The doctor said "Do you want to try again? We can go as much as you want but there is no response".
While this was going on there was a mist circling over me, a diffusion blurring the light and I looked down at Mom.
I heard this voice. "Grab her Hand".
I leaned down to Mom and said. "Give me two weeks". I held her hand and the doctor pressed the pads again on her chest. She arched out of the bed and the monitor started the beep, beep, beep and my Moms physical body was back. She was alive!!!
Like I had asked. She was with me to the day. Two Weeks later, I again held her hand on that final day along with her presence,her energy went thru all of me and out.
Mom had passed.
But from that moment my life would never be the same.
It was that moment that I died.
Not physically in the body, but the old Rand was gone.
I was born!! I was Free!
Let's start with a little Freedom!
Which leads me to what I have been experiencing since that and this started happening.
From that moment. There would be my Mom's voice comforting me. Literally coming out of nowhere. Comforting me all the way.
My mom never left!
How would I know it was her. The phrases that she used to use when I was a little boy jumping here and there.
Was I losing it?
Was I becoming mental?
This began my constant daily research of trying to understand the voice. Then there was the physical poking and pinching. When I was really young we would be sitting in temple( I am Jewish, Mazel tov!). I would start to fall asleep while the Rabbi would speak and she would pinch me. When Mom pinched me really hard, I yelled. "You pinched me". Mom was so embarrassed. We always laughed at that.
Then there was the slow movement of objects on my counters. It started with the bathroom counter and then graduated to the kitchen.
Mom was still here. My Mom was really here!
Not in the physical sense
Not a ghost.
A definite presence. My Mom!
I have come to understand after many many hours and really a lifetime of experience. The realization of "Intuitive". The realization of myself as "Intuitive".
Intuitives have many forms. The common being called "Medium". This was finally made solid a few weeks ago when I met another intuitive(medium). But this one is and I guess for your understanding one that speaks with the spirits of the ones that have passed.
In most case one that passes on information to the living that need reassurance the deceased is OK. That's a very common question. I came across this book that she had just released "In the Presence of Proof" by Deborah Hanlon.
Some back story from Deborah. She was introduced to me from a client that I had come to know from my work. Another brilliant soul that I immediately bonded with and was seeing her soul as we spoke.
Deborah was and is the real deal.
Deborah is the Proof!!
This is a gift that I knew I had, but could not understand at all why I could read into people the moment I met them. The gift has revealed itself to me in a great and wonderful way.
I could only do this if I had an immediate bond with the person that I was talking to at the time. And the person's soul would unravel to me. As I got to know the person more and more. I would be able to see their path and the road they have to travel to get there.
Right now and the future. The people that I open up to are surprised as I am as I reveal the deep person inside them. As I reveal to them who they are, but have not been able to say out loud.
As an intuitive I am not in the least losing it. I am finding it. This whole process started a larger journey for me. The people around me have noticed my path and the support has been amazing to say the least.
There were so many people that have told me I handled the passing of My Mom courageously.
Quickly and perfectly!
That's what I asked for from the universe before my Mom passed. The weeks before the final month before Mom went to the next dimension. Mom had said "I will always be with you". "The universe has always taken care of me when I asked". "It has never let me down"!.
I have held on that as long as I can remember. It was something that I have learned thru all the self help books. Thru all the Oprah, "AhHa" moments.
My journey into the now began when I asked the universe. "Show me my higher self" . And it is guiding me as I write this to you this very minute.
The next dimension or death is and can be scary because we do not know what to see..
You wonder if all the stories combined of seeing the enormous light are real.
If all these mediums(intuitives are real).
The best way I can tell you is when you read something or meet someone that shows you the realness of this, you will get a surge of energy. Kinda like the hairs on the back of your neck standing.
Of goosebumps.
Dependent on where you have evolved in your own status this time visiting this life will be the depth of what I am telling you now.
Think of the universe(god) etc. as the Mother ship. We are the smaller ships trying to get back home to the Mother ship. We get the connection we need and then she sends us back on our way to grow and learn more. Each time we are sent back, it's to learn more.
The universe is all about perfection and happiness. Because perfection is an ongoing pursuit and happiness and joy is the essence of the Mother Ship. We are always in a constant movement.
To take this a step further. Our energy never leaves us and once this vessel we are in (Our body) has been used. The mother ship sends us back over and over again.
Death is a process of living! Once you have had a tremendous loss of your own, you will or have begun the next step of your physical journey here. Don't ask "Why don't we just end this presence and go back to the universe". The answer is really simple.
"You must learn the lesson of this presence!.
We are in constant search of something better.
Something bigger.
Use this journey to get all you can. Know that the ones that love us never leave us. The universe is larger and bigger than we can comprehend. The physicality is not what we are used to all. The main goal of the universe is "Happiness". "Joy" . "Love"
Abundance, Success, Achievement are all around us. Just ask and Surrender to the Universe to point you there. "Surrender"
"Then Surrender more".
It is real!
It is happening!
Remember this "Words matter".
The universe responds to the simplest thought. If you say " I am smart. The universe responds with smarter. If you doubt then it's two steps back.
A push me pull you state!
You have to believe!
If you take two steps back then ask for the tools from the universe to move you forward. And then again. Keep repeating until there is no doubt.
To my friends in the entertainment/creative field that would include me as well. If you are an actor, writer, director/producer. Creative!
Then act like one. (Hint: Act).
Be it!
Live it. Don't be afraid to label yourself as actor, writer and director. Creative!
If you don't believe it then how can you expect others to as well?
The reason I chose this example is because it's my experience. And as a writer. You write what you know.
As an intuitive you have to share what you see and hear.
With that gift and like so many others .
You have a chance to leave a legacy. A legacy is the ability to move others.
If other people are moved then happiness becomes even larger. And in the end. "Don't you want to be happy" .
This intuitive, this producer, this designer, this director and this writer all say yes.!!! ...
LIve!-Live!-Live!
Yes . A lot to ponder so let's just Breathe!!. We just go Deeper and Deeper!